How to Control Your Worries So They Don’t Control You

As humans we are consistently worrying. We worry about paying bills, challenges that are plaguing us, challenges yet to come, the state of our relationships, and so on. These worries can become so attached to you that they may be controlling different aspects of your life.

Worrying causes stress and stress can take a major toll on our mental and physical health. Not to mention that many of us feel that what is worrying us can cause us to toss and turn and end up ultimately having an unrested sleep which can in turn effect our daily lives.

What if you could lessen the weight that worrying puts on you and your current and potential mind/body health?

There are many ways to cope with your worries but in this article I’m going to discuss one. This is a technique that I’ve used consistently with positive results to my mental state and clarity of mind. It has helped me control my thoughts so they don’t control me. Here is how you can implement a worry journal into your daily or weekly routine to help you begin to decipher and gauge your worries. You do not have to do this every day, but in doing so can create a therapeutic effect on your mind.

What do you need for this exercise?  You will need few sheets of paper, a pen or pencil, and a distraction free area for anywhere from ten minutes to half an hour.  You can also use your computer or phone that has a note taking template. Also, optional is a relaxing atmosphere equipped with relaxing scents, candles, meditation or relaxing music, etc.


Now, once you’re in your distraction free area with whatever it is you’ll be using to do this exercise I want you to take out your first sheet of paper and write down every single thing you are worried about. Rally them off and get them out of your head onto this sheet of paper. It doesn’t matter how big or small your worry is, let it find a home on this piece of paper.

On the next sheet of paper I want you to make three separate columns. Title the first column “Worries I Have Absolutely No Control Over.” Label the second Column “Worries I have the Power to Influence.” And lastly, label the third column “Worries I Have The Complete Power to Change.”

Once you have your columns labelled observe all the worries you wrote down on the first page. Take your time and re-organize these worries into whichever column they belong in.

Now, this may seem counter intuitive but I want you to focus on the list titled “Worries I Have Absolutely No Control Over.” Take this list and create metaphorical way in your mind of seeing these words disappear. You can imagine them dissipating into the air, melting like butter, or even envision them being burned if that floats your boat. The point is to create a natural way that works for you to acknowledge and then release the worries you can’t control. You can even scribble out all those worries with your pen or if using a computer or phone just go back and delete this column altogether.

So the next step is to take out another sheet of paper and write at the top of it “Worries I Have the Power to Influence.”

On this sheet of paper write down all the worries from that list leaving some space between each of them. Once you have done that for each worry you can influence write down how you can influence it to have a positive outcome. What can you physically do to alleviate the situation?

Do the same for the list labelled “Worries I Have the Complete Power to Change.” Rack your brain for different solutions you can do to deal with and cope with these particular worries. Think in the box and out of the box for different solutions.

Lastly, create a prioritized list of which worries need to be dealt with from least important to most important. Beside each individual worry set a date that you will want to achieve and actively put to work the solutions you had written beside each worry on the last sheet of paper.

There is no wrong way of doing this exercise as long as it leaves you feeling a bit more relaxed and in control of the situations you have the power to influence or control. In doing this exercise it will help you become in touch with your own personal power, guide you to find solutions and problem solve, promotes personal peace, helps you gain personal clarity, and if done when needed can help you to learn to acknowledge and control your thoughts so they don’t control you.

I hope you find this exercise helpful and I thank you for taking the time to read this.

Well wishes,

Danielle Gray




1 thought on “How to Control Your Worries So They Don’t Control You”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s